March 5, 2013

Top Ten Least Favorite Things About Star Wars Prequels:

1. Overusage of Special Effects
2. Underusage of Character Development
3. Completely Losing Sight of how Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader was a tragic hero and turning him into a bratty, snot-nosed kid who nobody felt sorry for.
4. Jar Jar Binks
5. Killing of the Most Interesting Character in the series (Darth Maul) and giving him one of the dumbest death scenes in the history of the Star Wars saga.
6. Turning an actress as brilliant as Natalie Portman into a talentless hack who delivered lines about as convincingly as Lindsay Lohan.
7. Making the prequels look sleeker and more modern than the sequels which take place before the prequels. I know it sounds confusing but think REAL HARD about it.
8. Jar Jar Binks
9. The refusal of certain Star Wars junkies to admit that the prequels are a steaming pile of donkey crap. No, really, they are. In fact, I'd rather watch two donkeys create a steaming pile of donkey crap than watch those pitiful excuses for movies.
10. The fact that I actually tried to convince myself that I enjoyed the first two movies in the prequel trilogy after first viewing them and now having to admit I was completely in denial of how ridiculously stupid they were.