Greg's Daily Top Ten Lists: May 2013

Friday, May 31, 2013

Monday, May 27, 2013

May 27, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Favorite U.S. War Films:

1. Full Metal Jacket
2. Platoon
3. Good Morning Vietnam
4. Glory
5. Heartbreak Ridge (OK, I'm pushing it here, but I freaking love this movie)
6. Saving Private Ryan
7. Apocalypse Now
8. The Dirty Dozen
9. The Deer Hunter
10. M.A.S.H.

Sunday, May 26, 2013

May 26, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Favorite Billy Idol Songs:

1. Cradle of Love
2. Eyes Without a Face
3. Sweet Sixteen
4. Daytime Drama
5. Flesh For Fantasy
6. Rebel Yell
7. White Wedding
8. Catch My Fall
9. Dancing With Myself
10. L.A. Woman

Wednesday, May 22, 2013

May 22, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Smiths/Morrissey Songs:

1. Everything sung by the great and powerful Morrissey
2-10. Everything else is utter rubbish

May 21, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Favorite Vocalists (6-10 today, 1-5 yesterday):

6. Sting
7. Michael Bublé
8. Robert Plant
9. Ronnie James Dio
10. Chris Cornell

Monday, May 20, 2013

May 20, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Favorite Vocalists (1-5 today, 6-10 tomorrow):

1. George Michael - Yeah, I know, but I'll tell you, than man has some serious pipes. I couldn't care less about his personal life, although it does provide some incredible comedy. I mean, only George Michael would get caught soliciting sex in a public bathroom, right? Anyways, the man can sing and I grew up listening to a ton of Wham! and George Michael solo. In fact, his 1988 release "Faith" was one of the first records I ever owned. Scott, you know all to well of my fondness for that record. How many times did I sing the hell out of "One More Try" when we used to go to karaoke together? Ah, those were the days. Anyways, here's a favorite track of his that I usually end up singing on my way to work...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=izGwDsrQ1eQ

2. Freddie Mercury - Well, if George Michael is #1 then that means Freddie Mercury can't be all that far behind, right? If this were a top ten performers list, Mercury would be #1 with a bullet. The man is the single greatest front man ever and nobody can dispute his place in music history. He's the artist I most wish were still alive today who's time came too quickly. This is, IMO, the single greatest live performance I've ever seen. I know I've posted it on my page countless times before, but it's un-fucking-believable how Mercury has every single person in the crowd of over 100,000 clapping and singing in unison. It's insane. Watch to the end, when he starts playing with the crowd. It's like nothing I've ever seen before or since.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0omja1ivpx0

3. Ann Wilson - I'm the kind of person who really doesn't give a crap what people think of me. I've listed two openly gay singers and now a woman. Deal with it. If I were a girl this is, without question, the person who's voice I would want. Not Aretha Franklin. Not Mariah Carey. Not Norah Jones. I would want to sing like Ann Wilson from Heart. That girl can cut glass with her voice and has some of the most incredible range I've ever heard. Her sister, Nancy, has a pretty damn good voice, too. It's almost unfair how two sisters could sound so amazing and be so talented. I hate how the music industry in the 1980s turned its back on Heart because of Ann's weight problems. You can even see it in this video as evidenced by the number of facial close-ups Ann gets as opposed to full body shots. Meanwhile, the very svelte Nancy gets a bunch of full body shots. Fat, thin, old, young...Ann Wilson has the best voice in rock, IMO...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zWzy5q_M5Ho

4. David Bowie - Ziggy Stardust had to make this list. It's unreal how Bowie has been able to re-invent himself countless times over the past five decades. Some would say he's a master at adapting to the current sound. I say he's a master at blazing trails. I think he has one of the most recognizable voices in music and there must be two or three dozen songs of his that I sing on a regular basis. I guess that's to be expected when an artist's body of work spans over 40 years. "Heroes" came out the year I was born, 1977, and might be my favorite of his "Berlin Years" tracks when he worked with producer Brian Eno. It's timeless.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tgcc5V9Hu3g

5. Daryl Hall - About fifteen years back a friend of mine pointed out to me that Hall & Oates are the most successful duo in music history. They have charted more Top 40 hits than any duo ever and that record still stands to this day. It's not a surprise, really. The two had 34 singles chart hits on the US Billboard Hot 100, seven RIAA platinum albums, and six RIAA gold albums. Only the Everly Brothers come close to the success that Hall & Oates have enjoyed. The phrase that most commonly gets associated with Daryl Hall is "Blue Eyed Soul" which seems fitting. He was blessed with an incredibly smooth sound. He's one of those singers who can sing with or without a band backing him up and sound outrageously good.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ccenFp_3kq8

May 19, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Reasons Why Total Recall 2012 Sucked

1. Because after 15 minutes I realized it was a better sleep aid than Ambien
2. Because I should have realized the movie was going to suck when I learned that the production company that funded the movie is called "Original Film". It's a fucking re-make you idiots. You are the LAST production company that should be funding this piece of crap.
3. Because the writers decided to re-hash a line or sequence from the original movie every five minutes.
4. Because virtually every cityscape scene was a complete rip-off of Blade Runner. Everything from the cement buildings, the Asian influence, the damn blimp advertising the "Offworld", the crowded streets, EVERYTHING ripped off of Blade Runner.
5. Because it made the original Total Recall feel like a well acted classic which is really hard to do when the lead actors are Arnold Schwarzenegger and Sharon Stone.
6. A serious lack of humor. One of the aspects of the original that made it such a success was how it parodied itself and never took itself seriously.
7. Because the best thing about the film was Colin Farrell's stubble.
8. Lens Flares...seriously, they are extremely annoying and unnecessary. See: Star Trek (2009)
9. PG-13. Seriously, you cannot re-make an ultra-violent classic piece of sci-fi like Total Recall and bring it down to PG-13.
10. The movie successfully found a way to waste the extraordinary talent of Bryan Cranston and that's almost impossible to do.

Friday, May 17, 2013

May 17, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Favorite Bill Paxton Movies:

1. Aliens
2. Tombstone
3. Apollo 13
4. True Lies
5. Weird Science (effing hilarious!!!)
6. Frailty
7. Twister
8. Near Dark
9. Vertical Limit
10. Navy Seals

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

May 15, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Favorite Clark Moments

1. Getting Clark to laugh on command by tickling under his armpits. Pure awesome.
2. Seeing Clark's face every time I come home from work. Nothing says joy quite like having a long rough day at work and seeing your son smiling at you because he's excited to see you.
3. Clark peeing all over both Myriah and I while we were changing his diaper. We should have known that was going to happen!
4. Watching the little bugger blow raspberries all over the place because he's figuring out how to use his lips.
5. Seeing his thunder thighs grow to epic proportions. Seriously, the man is going to either be a powerlifter or an offensive lineman.
6. Having him constantly mistake my nose for a nipple. That kid has a good latch!
7. Seeing him splash and play while taking a bath. Good to see he's over that whole "I hate the water" stage.
8. Feeding him "real food" for the first time. The man loves his avocado, just like his daddy.
9. Bringing him home from the hospital for the first time.
10. Everything else, because every moment is precious. =)

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

May 12, 2013

Today, I present to you Top Ten List #200, written by my mother for my birthday:

Mom's Top Ten Memories of Me List:

1. "You and Me Against the World" was the first song I sang to you when I found out I was pregnant.
2. The look in your eyes when you wanted to stay up with me at night when I had the candles lit and the music on..."Mommy I just want to stay up and keep you company."
3. All the trips to Toys R Us at midnight for Star Wars Figures.
4. Us taking the bus all over town and you telling the bus driver what streets were coming up next.
5. The first box of Baseball Cards I got you in hopes it would improve your printing and memory...And It DID!!
6. All the card shows we went to and all the calls we would get at the house from grown men wanting your advice.
7. When you were picked to be the Drummer Boy in the Christmas play at school and I made your outfit. Everyone loved you so much that they started to clap and you thought you had done something wrong and almost started crying.
8. The first time you were an Alter Attendant I was so busy making sure you didn't need help that I forgot to sit down during mass and Father said, "I think he has it, Maria."
9. When you got your first haircut and came home with a flat top with wings slicked back on the sides...You looked like you had aged 5 years and I cried..
10. The first time I saw you hold your own son and thought what A Wonderful Man you have grown up to be. Greg, I am so very Proud of you. You are and always will be my life...You have married a beautiful lady and you both have given me a Wonderful Grandson.

So to you my Son I wish you A Very Happy Birthday and may your life be filled with warm loving memories like I have...God Bless my son...this is the best Top Ten I could give you and I like this Birthday Card better then Hallmark.

Your Mom

Friday, May 10, 2013

May 10, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Shows That Ended Too Soon:

1. Firefly (2002)
2. Veronica Mars (2004-2007)
3. My So-Called Life (1994)
4. Freaks & Geeks (2000)
5. Pushing Daisies (2007)
6. Jericho (2006-2007)
7. The Misfits of Science (1985-1986)
8. Playmakers (2003)
9. The Adventures of Brisco County Jr. (1993-1994)
10. Police Squad! (1982)

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

May 9, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Shows That Lasted Way Too Long (part 2 today, part 1 yesterday):

6. The A-Team: I know, it's total 80s blasphemy to say that The A-Team lasted way too long. However, those of you that recall the show's premise and ultimate demise might understand why this is on the list. The A-Team were a group of four men who were wrongfully accused by the U.S. government of crimes they did not commit. They were sentenced to prison even though the government was aware they were innocent. They escaped from prison and became soldiers of fortune. Simply put, they were pretty pissed at the United States government for turning on them and leaving them to rot in a prison. Then, all the sudden, in Season 5 they go working for the very government that screwed them over and are sent on secret CIA missions. Awesome. Just awesome. While we're at it, why don't we introduce a new annoying character, Frankie Santana, and make him a member of the A-Team even though he's not a soldier? Oh, wait, they did and chances are you don't remember him, right? That's because the A-Team was only awesome when it was a four-man team and became instantly forgettable the moment it grew to five. If you really want to get precise, you can pretty much say that the official episode the show went downhill was Season 4 Episode 16, when Boy George guest starred. Yep, Boy Fucking George guest starred on the A-Team playing the character of "Cowboy George" and my was Mr. T. excited to see him.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cMfYDQ7RKg

Yeah, clean living Mr. T of the A-Team, who did a number of anti-drug spots in the 1980s, was thrilled to see Boy George, the coked out of his mind lead singer of The Culture Club. And so went the A-Team's credibility and Boy George's career aspirations. The A-Team lasted just one more season and The Culture Club never had another Top 40 hit after that little cameo.

7. Heroes: I think it's safe to say the first season was pretty awesome. The characters were interesting, the storylines were intriguing and the pace of the show was swiftly moving along in an exciting fashion. Most everyone who watched Season 1 couldn't wait to see what was going happen in Season 2. Then, after a long wait, Season 2 arrived and never got going. There were far too many characters being introduced, character development suffered because there were too many story arcs to follow and it seemed as though every single episode would use the same predictable and boring formula that got old very fast. Finish an episode with a seemingly huge cliffhanger, start the next episode by not answering a single thing from the previous episode, drag out a boring episode for 55 minutes, finish the episode with a seemingly huge cliffhanger. Wash. Rinse. Repeat. The first two or three times a show does that in succession it's interesting. When it happens for the duration of an entire season it becomes boring and fruitless. The fans lost interest. The show started trying to recoup the magic of the first season by continuously jumping the shark like when Sylar, the arch-nemesis of all things benevolent and kind, decided to turn good or Mohinder turning into a giant bug a la Jeff Goldblum in The Fly. It just got worse and worse. Maybe this show doesn't really belong on this list since it only had one awesome season. But if it ended like Firefly, waaaaaaaaaaay before its time, we'd all be still talking about how awesome Heroes was and geeks everywhere would treat Heroes creator Tim Kring with the same reverence Firefly creator Joss Wheedon receives.

8. Lost: I'll admit, I never really watched Lost. In fact, the only times I ever watched Lost was when my wife had it on. Each and every time I watched I was utterly confused which would make a lot of sense when one considers I didn't see the show from the beginning. However, when I ask the most ardent Lost fans how they would describe the show, most of them use the word "confusing" or some derivative. Would it be safe to say that the writers of the show never actually knew how to end the show and dragged things out to the point of madness because they didn't know what the hell they were doing? Maybe I'm not being fair here. After all, I didn't watch the show from the beginning and I certainly didn't watch the show with any regularity. But most fans I've spoken to found the ending to be a total cop-out that left fans wondering why they hell they watched for six seasons only to discover that (SPOILER ALERT) everyone was dead. It's almost like the writers had carefully crafted this massive puzzle and when they were about to finish it they had this one big piece that wouldn't quite fit so they crammed it in and fucked the whole thing up.

9. The X-Files: I think I stopped watching when David Duchovny decided to call it quits. Though I have to admit, when I did tune in for an episode in the post-Mulder era, I wasn't turned off by Robert Patrick's character John Doggett. But it just wasn't the same. When I think X-Files I think Mulder and Scully. I don't think Doggett and Reyes (Annabeth Gish). I think we all can agree that when the two most integral characters on a show decide to leave it before it ends, it cannot be a good omen. As a result, I never really watched many episodes past Season 7, right around the time Duchovny called it a day and decided to focus on infidelity instead of his acting prowess. Most fans tell me not to bother since very little really got resolved. I mean, let's be honest, the only way to end that show was for Mulder and Scully to have a glorious sex scene on an alien spacecraft orbiting Jupiter. Now that would have been a ratings bonanza!

10. Anything Kardashian: I make the rules here because it's my list and my blog. I could write a top 200 list of shows that shouldn't have lasted one episode. Every show featuring a Kardashian sister is so infantile and moronic that it makes me want to punch myself in the groin just knowing there are millions of people out there who tune in every week and contribute to the Kardashian family bankroll. I would rather drink a gallon of turpentine and piss on a forest fire than watch a full episode of The Kardashians. It's the most useless excuse for a television show and makes it perfectly clear to me why other countries of the world want to bomb ours into oblivion. I could lose less IQ points listening to Nickelback albums backwards than I could by watching a single episode of Khloe and Lamar. I mean, who the hell comes up with this crap? Remember when Bravo used to actually air smart television progams? Today it's littered with the TV equivalent of raw sewage: The Kardashians, Millionaire Matchmaker, Real Housewives of Who Gives a Flying Fuck. It's the single most worthless network on television today and makes me wonder how long it will take for our country to realize just how stupid "reality" programming really is and move on to something more thought-provoking, like watching Giada de Laurentiis' boobs while she cooks an omelette.

May 8, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Shows That Lasted Way Too Long (part 1 today, part 2 tomorrow):

1. How I Met Your Mother: There was a time I used to look so forward to watching this program. It was the highlight of my television schedule for several years and most of that was due to the incredibly hilarious portrayal of the womanizing Barney portrayed by Neil Patrick Harris. Once Barney cut off his own manhood and started "falling in love" with the Robin, played by Cobie Smulders, I started losing interest. It's not that I have any problem with falling in love. In fact, I think that Jason Segal and Alyson Hannigan fill that role quite nicely on the program as lovebirds Marshall and Lily. But the reason the show was awesome was because Barney balanced out the other characters who were constantly chasing love by being the one guy who was chasing tail. Once he stopped being a chauvinistic pig, the show stopped being Legen...wait for it...dary. These days I struggle to watch and just want Ted to finally reveal to us who the mother of his kids are and did we really need nine seasons for that to happen?

2. Miami Vice: Yeah, that's right. Miami Vice. For those of you who don't recall or are too young to remember, Miami Vice was one of the most watched and revered shows of the 1980s. It was the perfect 80s crime drama centered around colorful MTV music, hip fashion and the excessively suave Miami backdrop. The first three seasons were awesome and kept me completely interested, mostly because there was a perfect blend of style and substance. The writing was top notch and the stories were gripping. Then, sometime between seasons 3 and 4, the show took a massive nosedive into stupidity. I mean, seriously, anyone who has ever watched Miami Vice with any regularity can point to Season 4 Episode 7 (Missing Hours) as being the moment the show jumped the shark and ceased to be awesome. The original writers of the show left by the time Season 4 debuted and if you get the chance to watch "Missing Hours" you'll wonder if the writers were replaced by 12 year-old children. Nothing says "Miami Vice" quite like Sonny & Crockett encountering a UFO and James Brown portraying an alien. It's beyond stupid and the show never recovered. Mercifully, the show only lasted two more seasons but they were both terrible.

3. Roseanne: There was a time when Roseanne used to be about a down on their luck family with real issues. Then Roseanne won the lottery, Dan (John Goodman) died and the whole show went to crap. When the entire show is based on the premise that the family at the center of the show is going through real life issues and struggles it seems impossible to me that someone thought winning the lottery was a good turn for the show to take. It's beyond ridiculous. The comedy of Roseanne was the tragedy. The tragedy about the Connor family winning the lottery is that the writers stole the integrity of one of the best programs on television.

4. Cosby Show: I think it's fairly safe to say that when a show introduces a new kid character, it's trying too hard to stay fresh. I can think of no better example than when, in Season 6, The Cosby Show introduced us to Olivia (Raven Symone). I guess having all those cool kids in the house wasn't enough so they needed to bring on board arguably one of the most annoying human beings on the planet to play Denise's (Lisa Bonet) bratty stepdaughter. From the moment Symone joined the cast it seemed every episode was inundated with her character. Raven Symone still annoys the crap out of me to this day and I have wonder if she's "acting" at all when she plays the extremely precocious Olivia on The Cosby Show. Stop watching The Cosby Show after Season 5 ends and save your sanity.

5. Seinfeld: Let's just say I've still never really forgiven the writers for the final episode, which has to be one of the biggest letdowns in the history of television finales. It's utterly embarrassing to say the least and even the most zealous Seinfeld apologists will tell you it's a terrible way to end the show. I enjoyed the writers bringing back old characters. After all, I do love nostalgia, but the way it ended with everyone getting "revenge" on the main characters and ultimately sending them to prison was lame. I can't really say I know any single better way to end it because there are probably a million better ways to have done it.

Saturday, May 4, 2013

May 4, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Random Star Wars Factoids:

1. The carbon freezing scene in The Empire Strikes Back was written in as a way of killing off Han Solo in case Harrison Ford did not re-sign for the sequel Return of the Jedi.

2. Most of the Stormtroopers are left-handed. That is because of how the weapons are constructed. Their weapons are based on a real weapon, where the magazine is on left side of the weapons. This construction caused it to hit the troopers in the chest. Therefore they have to switch grip of the weapon, which made them look left-handed.

3. Terri Nunn of the 80s new wave band Berlin was in the running for the role of Princess Leia and had readings with Harrison Ford and Mark Hamill.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KXy59jMqOsc

4. The word Ewok is never mentioned at any point during Return of the Jedi.

5. At 30, The Empire Strikes Back has the lowest body count of the entire Star Wars saga.

6. Darth Vader has only 12 minutes of screen time in Star Wars Episode IV

7. Originally to be titled "Revenge of the Jedi" but producers thought Jedis wouldn't seek revenge. Some posters and theater stand-ups were made early, but pulled very soon as the title changed names. Also Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan was originally to be called "Star Trek: The Revenge of Khan", but the title for that movie was changed to avoid confusion with this movie back when "Revenge of the Jedi" was being considered. Neither film ended up using the word "revenge" in their titles.

8. Return of the Jedi is the first film to mention the TIE Fighter by name, when Lando issues the order to split up to "get some of those TIE Fighters to follow".

9. Star Wars Episode IV is the first film to make over $300,000,000 domestically.

10. 20th Century Fox was so sure Star Wars was going to be a disaster that they came within a matter of days of selling off their stake in the film as a tax shelter. Positive feedback from an advanced screening made them change their minds, and the profits from the film ended up saving the studio from bankruptcy.

May 3, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Random Music Factoids:

1. The Robert Palmer song "Addicted to Love" actually was recorded with Chaka Khan as a duet. However, due to a contractual issue, her voice had to be removed and the version you hear now is the duet version with Khan's voice deleted out of it.

2. For years a tale has been told about Van Halen's inclusion of "No Brown M&Ms" in their tour rider. Many have thought that the band's mention of "No Brown M&Ms" was an arrogant request made by rock stars who felt they were entitled to silly requests. Truth is, the inclusion of the clause was due to the band's desire to have a road crew that was so attentive to detail they wouldn't miss something as seemingly trivial as "No Brown M&Ms." Due to the large number of on stage accidents due to road crews that were inattentive to safety protocols, Van Halen began including little details like this one into their rider to ensure the safety of the band. After all, if the crew won't pay attention to that clause, who knows what other more "important" measures they cut corners on.

3. Leo Fender, the inventor of the Stratocaster and Telecaster couldn't play the guitar.

4. Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" record stayed on the Billboard Top 200 charts for 741 weeks.

5. You could listen to the entire Beatles library of songs in 10 hours and 33 minutes.

6. The first single to ever be released online was Duran Duran's "Electric Barbarella" in 1997. Because the band released the single online instead of in stores, most retail outlets wouldn't sell the record in stores as a backlash for going behind their backs and selling the single online. The "Medazzaland" record the single comes from ended up being one of their worst selling albums ever.

7. Pat Benetar's "You Better Run" was the second video ever played on MTV. The first, well, if you don't know it by now...

8. The 1,000,000th video played on MTV was also it's first, "Video Killed the Radio Star" by The Buggles.

9. The first music video ever shot was was Queen's "Bohemian Rhapsody."

10. Eddie Van Halen plays the guitar solo in Michael Jackson's hit song "Beat It" but was not allowed to participate in the music video due to Warner Bros. not allowing one of its artists to be shown in a video for a rival studio's artist. Jackson was signed to Epic Records.

Thursday, May 2, 2013

May 2, 2013

Greg's Top Ten Favorite Childhood Cartoons:

1. The Adventures of Rocky & Bullwinkle
2. The Pink Panther
3. The Road Runner
4. Pinky & The Brain (Anamaniacs)
5. Duck Tales
6. Transformers
7. G.I. Joe
8. Chip & Dale Rescue Rangers
9. Inspector Gadget
10. TMNT